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He remembered the sense of goodness he had felt from her and her openness. She had felt a connection with him that made her automatically comfortable.Diun had not had to try with her. Everything had felt so natural and he had truly enjoyed it. It was not simply lust but something different, something more. Finding this feeling interesting and wonderful he dwelled on it living in the moment.Like gas to a flame the dark flame he had used to win so many battles sprang forth showing on each hand at first. It was made from psychic energy that he had learned to control over the years. He alone had learned to master it while the rest of his people were incapable of achieving it. Turning white it began to spread over his body covering him from head to toe.Just like all the other times when it had stayed on his hands Diun felt no pain or suffered any damage. The same warmth was there like before but he felt the heat within him grow stronger.The heat went from the outside in meeting at his core. If you really want to go into womanhood themost friendly way for your body is to get you castrated in order tostop your male hormone production. Once this is done the feminisationcan be obtained much faster and with low doses of female hormones andit gives always a much more harmonious result. Unfortunately,castration is considered a serious thing in Switzerland, almost thesame as SRS and it is not available without a long series of medicaland psychiatric authorisation and support. This is completely stupidand in my view it would be much better to perform the castration soonafter the patients decision and then wait for SRS the necessary time.In case the patient would reverse, some results could still be obtainedthrough medication with male hormones. But reversing patients seem tobe extremely rare, I have never seen one, nor heard about one from acolleague."Each time she used the word castration I felt chills all over my body,again this struggle between longing to surrender and fight.
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